It is the first anniversary of the death of legendary actor Irrfan Khan today. Yes, it’s been a year since we lost a gem of an actor, since Babil and Ayaan lost their dear father and Sutapa Sikdar lost her loving husband. This void left by Irrfan cannot be filled in either their life or the entertainment world. On his first death anniversary, Babil Khan opened up about the loss of his father, his struggle to cope with pain and his greatest regret. Speaking to The Times of India, Babil said he had suicidal thoughts days after losing his father. Initially, he maintained a courageous position, but eventually he crashed and plunged into depression. “During the first few days Mom was like how come he takes it so well?” I was running around, doing everything, making sure everything was okay at home and in the hospital. It was really bad, however. I can’t explain the amount of pain he felt when he was conscious. I especially remember when they were going to put in a catheter, and asked me to leave the room, and he almost shouted, ‘Babil, tum kahin mat jao mujhe chhod ke! ‘They pulled me out of the room and he called out my name. I have never felt so much pain and helplessness. I stood there outside, hearing him scream my name. I handled the problem well at the time, but after he passed away – at first Mumma was surprised at how well I was handling him – but two days after his death I crashed. I just crashed. Everything stopped. I went into a deep depression. I can’t even explain. There was no will to wake up. I was very suicidal… ”the aspiring actor paused as he revealed his breaking point.
After a while he added, “I was done. I had no will to live. I still fight a lot. And at that time, Mumma was the force. She has always been the strength of our family. Throughout Baba’s career. You know everyone is like Baba was this, Baba was that – but Baba would have been nothing without Mumma, she was the strength of the family. ”
Speaking of the thing he regrets the most, Babil revealed that he wishes Paan Singh Tomar actor could see him watching. During the interview, he said his father missed seeing him act in his [Babil] 8th grade. He recalled how he played an extra while filming Qarib Qarib’s single. He said: “He saw me play once, however (laughs)! I was assisting the camera crew in Qarib Qarib Single. There was this photo where me and my then girlfriend we had. that one second shot as extras. And he was so excited to see me on camera, he just took over (laughs)! He didn’t even want to let Tanuja Madam say “ action ” too! took it all over, he came over to say ‘action’, I saw that joy on his face, I can’t explain it to you … I wish he had looked at me. ”
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